You know what? I love Singapore. Yes, it’s clean and beautiful and has the most amazing public transport system as well as a rockin’ airport….

BUT

Those are not really the primary reasons I love that country. The number one reason is because there is someone there who is so special to me. Someone who, despite being younger than me, teaches me how to react maturely in conflict. (I’m still learning)

Who listens to every thought in my head and actually cares what I think….despite how seriously crazy those thoughts tend to be sometimes.

Who loves God with all of his heart, making that love pour out over me and those that are around him.

Who gives me joy and thankfulness to have the privilege of being in his life.

Who is humble and teachable and always willing to learn.

Who is an example to me in more ways than one.

Who I miss….

I love Singapore. Can I go back now?

There is one kind of bug that I like…the travel bug. I think it is no surprise that I like to travel. Why else would someone live on a cramped ship for a year? Besides the whole ‘following God’ thing, of course.

But traveling is something that I really enjoy. There is something about visiting various cultures and hearing different languages that makes me happy. The world is so big and it seems a waste to not see more of it.

Right now I sit in Indonesia (a new area of the country from where I had been before). I am visiting some new friends and fellow radio compadres.  We are discussing programming for a new radio station in the area. It’s good to chat and get familiar with their life here. They are gracious enough to house me and feed me and be great hosts. Their oldest daughter is currently in the US so I am their substitute daughter and try to be the wise older sister to their two sons. I’ve already solidly beat them in ‘bluff’ so I’d say our relationship is off to a great start! It really is a blessing to stay here with them and get to know them better.

I return to Manila on Sunday afternoon and then Wed head out to South Korea. This will be my first time there and I am so looking forward to going! One of my friends from the Doulos is teaching English there and will be housing me and showing me around for a few days. I should also be able to meet up with other Douloids who are now back in their homes there.

Then the second week of August I will be traveling again; this time to Papua New Guinea. There is a team there hoping to come up with some programming for a local station that is willing to air it for free. Mostly Bible translations in the local languages. There is no one on staff who is skilled in developing radio programming so I am glad to help them figure out the best way for them to consistently producing the program for the station.

In the future, I may be making trips to Singapore to meet with the Wycliffe offices there and after that look to be possibly traveling for a video production product. I am the program manager and we will be showing how rural churches all over the world are getting involved in the great commission.  No matter what your means, everyone can and should help. We’ll be hoping to gather stories in Asia, Africa, Europe, and South America. And I would get to travel to each area and help manage the product. You can just imagine me on cloud 9 right now! It is such a privilege to work for the Lord and to travel while doing so is an added bonus.

If you could travel tomorrow, where would you go?

Seriously you people. You lurkers who jump on my blog, read my post, and then leave without so much as a hello. Send a sister some love!

You know how Tinkerbell needs to be clapped to life? I need to be commented to life. So please, leave a word or two when you come by so that I don’t suffer from a massive “I don’t believe in comments!” death.

I love it when I read a bible verse and suddenly see it with new eyes.  A truth I never recognized before is now staring at me in black and white. Especially when you have heard the verse a million times and could recite it with no problem. It is often when you get to that point with a verse—regurgitating it easily without really thinking of what it’s saying—that God suddenly whips the blindfold off your eyes and you’re left going “Ohhhhh! Wow. God, you are cool.”

Tell me what you see when you read this verse. Or what you’ve unconsciously begun to think over the years in church where you’ve heard messages on it.

“Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? … I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

Romans 8:35,38-39

I have always focused on the fact that through any difficult circumstance or seemingly impossible feat, God is still there loving me. Nothing can tear us away from His never-ending love. Even those gut-wrenching, impossibly disheartening circumstances where all seems lost, God knows exactly where to find us and how to love us.

But this time I saw the world “angel” in the verse. Wait, why would an angel try to separate me from God? Angel’s are good, right? Except for that one who rebelled…and the others that followed him. But the ones that stayed, those are the ultimate dream team of angels. Maybe it was just thrown in there for good measure since it’s the antithesis of demon. Then I noticed another set of words equally opposed. Death and life. Yes, often we focus on the fact that death cannot separate me from God. In fact, as a Christ follower, it would bring me to a new life with him in Heaven. But LIFE. That is the ‘jump out’ word. I’ve never pondered the significance of LIFE in this verse and that it cannot divide me from the love of God. The hustle and bustle. The busyness and doing and being and working and living and everything that comes with just existing on this little rock called Earth. The mundane and monotony. Not just huge, scary, intimidating problems, but just….LIFE.

When I get so distracted by what’s going on during my day that I neglect pulling out my Bible and hearing from Him…he still loves me.

When new and exciting things happen and I forget to continuously thank the One who provided them…he still loves me.

When I’m selfish and spend too much of my time on what I want to do instead of what He wants me to do with it…he still loves me.

It is powerful to think how God can tear apart any hardship, danger, or persecution and still shower us with His love, but isn’t it also amazing to think when my life seems anything but interesting, that love is still there and just as powerful? He’s not just sitting on the sidelines waiting for some disaster so he can swoop in and show off (though he totally could). He’s standing beside me every single moment of every single day. Loving me as much in my everyday LIFE as he would in my afflictions.

And when the busyness of that everyday LIFE starts to crowd in and form a wedge in between me and my Father, He’s ready to bust through with his eternal love and wrap me up in it. Never forgetting me for one instant. That’s the Father I serve.

Ohhhhh! Wow. God, you are cool.

Yes, I have a regular soap opera involving me, cockroaches, and a fight to the death. I’m sorry I keep bringing it up but honestly, they are invading my life and I hate bugs soooooo, you hear about it.

Now before you think I am some nasty pig who never cleans her place, this is a tropical climate. They just thrive here….nothing can be done. EVERYONE has cockroaches in Manila. It’s a way of life. One that I am not adapting to very well. I have only ever found them in the kitchen, which seems natural enough. But these are not tiny little pests…they are about the size of….let me think….OH! One of those big pink erasers you bought for elementary school. You know, one of those things below:

Granted I know I could’ve just uploaded a picture of an actual cockroach but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. They’re in my life too much as it is. But the pink eraser…NOW you understand the enormity of the situation! Seriously, just had a body shiver thinking of it.

Ok, back to my story. They’re usually in the kitchen. My shoe attacks. I scoop up the dead body (careful not to let it touch me whatsoever). I whine. I clean up cockroach guts. All is right with the world once again. I’m also always scanning the kitchen whenever I enter it now for any traces of an insect to kill. If there was a demand for stealth cockroach assassins in the army, I would be born for that role. Seeing as how that is not yet a need, I’ll remain here for a bit longer. But guys, if you need me, I’ll do my part for the country!

Oops, got off track again. So last night everything changed. The cockroach epidemic adjusted course. There was a migration. From kitchen to bathroom. Guess there is some military know-how in these bugs as well. Always attack your opponent when they least expect it. I was unprepared. Just going to the bathroom for, well, matters of business when suddenly out of the corner of my eye….

COCKROACH ON THE FLOOR!

Moment of panic. I didn’t know what to do. It was between me and the door. Did my foot touch it when I came in? Body shiver. Could I make it past it without being attacked? Unlikely. What could I kill it with? Toilet paper? Ew. 1. The dispenser was too close to the battlezone 2. Toilet paper is thin. There is a chance I would feel it through the layers. No. No. 3. That would make me get waaaay too close.

Scan of my surroundings again. Bag of cotton balls. I could whip it to death. Would that work or would the impact be too soft thus allowing the cockroach to escape? Keep looking. Shampoo bottle. Messy and I would not want to touch that bottle again. Slight whine escapes. Focus Rachel, never give up hope! Bucket in the shower! With dipper! I never use those. What are they even there for? I’m not Asian, I don’t know. I still haven’t been able to figure out how you use them to wash yourself after a potty break. Don’t your pants get wet? Are you really clean? Do you leave with a wet mess all over the floor?

I digress. The dipper. That would work! There is a handle thus assuring maximum distance from point of impact. It’s solid and sure to kill. I quickly grabbed and swug with appropriate force. Cockroach on it’s back. Slightly moving. Hit #2.

COCKROACH FLIPS….TRIES TO RUN….GOING TO GET AWAY!!!!

Hit #3, 4, 5.

Pause.

Dead.

Scoops cockroach into dipper. Flushes down toilet. Escapes from bathroom without ever completing business. I mean it was just in there! It could be resurrected and return from the sewers to attack. No, I can hold it. And hold it I did. For an insane amount of time considering the absolute ridiculous reasoning for avoidance.

So the saga continues. I won’t say this is the series finale, because I’m pretty sure it won’t be. The cockroaches will be back. But I’ll have my dipper. And I’ll be ready.

Hi, I’m American.

Like many Americans, I only speak English. (boo)

I am not happy with that fact.

That is the basic information you need to know, first of all. I’ve always wanted to learn another language, it’s just never happened. Let’s look back to high school. You’re forced to take a foreign language. Being the independent middle child that I am, I decided I was going to take French instead of Spanish like my two older siblings had done. Oh the stories I could tell you about that class! It was crazy and fun and not filled with the most brainy of students…if I’m being honest. I remember one girl tried to hot glue chocolate chips to paper to represent the Pyrenees mountain range. Chocolate. HOT glue. Enough said.

So I can’t say that I tried my hardest in that class. But I’m not sure it would’ve mattered. I was HORRIBLE at the pronunciation. In fact, I once tried to speak French to a friend from church whose parents were from Congo. He literally could not understand a word I said.  I swear I was speaking French. I think. Or maybe it was more like Joey’s attempt on Friends…

Moving on to college. I decided to try Spanish. Much easier to pronounce and, I heard, learn. It was easier, BUT, I had four semesters of it with a different teacher each time. It is hard to learn that way. Now since I have not used it in however many years, I remember very little Spanish.

So, now I’m in Manila, Philippines. Before I came, everyone insisted I would not need to learn another language because everyone speaks English. That is partially true. Most people here do speak conversational English, though not all. The thing I have come to realize is that English is not what most would choose to speak on a regular basis. Here, the first language is Tagalog (tah-gah-log). When I am taking public transport to work, this is what I hear. When I walk down the street, this is what I hear. When the women in the office talk to each other, this is what I hear. Not only would I love to learn Tagalog to be able to speak it, but I think it shows people respect. I am living in their country, why not learn their language?

I have had five lessons so far. My teacher is amazingly sweet and patient. Tagalog is not an easy language, but it is fun to try to learn. I still cannot carry on a conversation, but I am able to pick up words everyday as people chat around me. Slowly but surely. The sound is similar to spanish and they even use some spanish words since they were ruled by the spanish for so many years. I will say this: I hate sentence structure. Not fun, not fun at all. Still, I am determined to keep studying and, by the time I leave, be better than when I came. Shouldn’t be too hard!

Ingat po kayo (take care)!

Yes, the play on words is intentional. If you know me, it is no secret that I dislike seafood. It’s not for lack of trying. I have tasted many types, often more than once, in hopes that my tastebuds have changed and I can now tolerate eating the creatures of the sea. Well, it wasn’t as much my hopes as the hopes of friends who were determined to convert me into a fish lover. Unfilled hopes, I might add.

As for me, I’m perfectly fine with not eating seafood. I don’t feel I’m missing out on anything. There’s chicken, beef, pork, turkey…all of which I truly love. Why try to force something that is just not going to happen? I am not starving. I still have a healthy portion of meat on my bones. Maybe even too healthy.  Let’s hear it for love-handles!

The problem is, I live in Asia, in the Philippines. A country that is surrounded by water. And what is in these waters? Food! Just not food I care to eat. I get a strange look from people here when they find out I don’t like seafood. It is a foreign concept to them. Then like many blessed souls, they want to help by assuring me I just haven’t tasted the right kind of fish. The fresh kind. Once I do that, I’ll never be the same. Problem is, I have done that. Still don’t like it. Sorry. It’s just so….fishy. I know, I am weird. Blame it on my mom’s allergies to most seafood. Perhaps there is a heriditary anti-fish gene that was passed down somewhere.

People often want to know what it is that I dislike so much about seafood.  I’ve generously compiled a list….apparently for my own humiliation. But look people, God created us all differently for a reason. Let’s embrace each other despite odd meal preferences, ok?

1. The smell. Fish stink. You cannot convince me otherwise. When I walk through a market by the fish stalls, I must start breathing through my mouth so I do not gag. I wish I were exaggerating. Occasionally a neighbor in my apt building will cook some kind of fish breakfast. A food I always assumed was never meant to be consumed during the early hours of the morning. I generally tend to set world records in my speed for getting ready for work those days. But maybe if the time comes for fish to start smelling like vanilla or chocolate or coffee…I will jump on board and start downing them.
2. If it wasn’t for the taste. I’m not sure how to describe it, but to say it tastes….FISHY. I don’t like it. I think this is the most basic and understandable reason for not eating a particular type of food. How can you argue with logic?
3. It stares at you. A fish head on my plate with it’s gray, glossy eye stalking my every move? I’m not a fan.
4. Is it alive or isn’t it? There is something so wrong about eating something that is in the same state as it was when it was alive. I like my food to be cooked and in a different configuration so I don’t have to think about the fact that I’m eating some creature that was alive not that long ago. Lobster. When I crack the shell, it seems like I’m breaking it’s bones. Creepy. I feel like a canibal. Fish. Let’s go back up to #3…don’t forget about that. But also, it looks like it was just alive (and probably was)! I can’t get past it. Prawns. Big bugs. That is what they look like. And I don’t like bugs. It may be a mind block, but I cannot bring myself to put one of those in my mouth. Please don’t make me.
5. The bones. It is hard work to eat a fish here in Asia. You have to pick out all the tiny bones as you eat. I’m a lazy consumer. I just want to put something tasty in my mouth, chew, and swallow. I was even taught how to properly open up a newly dead fish in order to eat it. I opened. I ate it. I’m hoping I won’t have to use that skill in the future.

Lucky for me I live with some of the most hospitible and friendly people in the world. After the initial shock, they generally don’t care too much about my interesting eating habits. Not only that, but the Philippines has some delicious food! And really almost any kind that you could want. But if you ever visit here, let me recommend a couple traditional Filipino dishes that you must try. Sisig. Adobo. Tocino. Pancit. Those are my favorites and DELECTIBLE! You won’t be sorry.

You know, I may never encounter a true seafood conversion, but I know I will never starve in this wonderful city!

You know what makes my heart so happy? To see or hear about the fruits of serving God. Whether it’s me or someone else, it doesn’t matter. There is so much joy in simply seeing how God is working.

Last night I went to dinner at a friend’s house (yay for wonton soup!) and was able to meet her roommate for the first time.  She was excited to learn that I had lived aboard the Doulos and began to tell me why. Thirteen years ago in 1997, the Doulos visited Manila. A small team of three went out into the community for outreach ministry. They spent time with kids outdoors teaching them how to make balloon animals and performing dramas. The female on the team was focused on one girl in the audience, the woman sitting before me now, telling her story. Her life was changed that day. She heard the gospel for the first time and accepted the gift of eternal life that God offers to every one of us. Since that day, she has continued to grow in her relationship with Christ and is so thankful that these three Doulos crew spent time that day, no matter how short, sharing about what brings them so much joy.

It just goes to show, you never know how God is going to use your life. There may be a soft voice inside you that tells you to do something that seems insignificant or even ridiculous, but God can use it. And most likely, He will…whether we’re aware of the fruit of that obedience or not. That is what is so great about serving a God that I am incapable of understanding. He does not fit into a box. I cannot comprehend why he does everything that he does. But I can trust. That is all I am tasked to do. Obey…and trust God with the rest.

Exhale.

That’s pretty freeing. I don’t have to force solutions or outcomes for situations. Or even know how they turn out. God has it under control. I’m so thankful for that today.

God, allow us to live in complete obedience to your leading and leave the rest in your hands! Amen.

Just a little Olympic trivia for you. Remember the insanely fast (and slightly cocky) Jamaican runner?

I’m only making this highly false comparison because I ran a “marathon” this weekend. Technically a 3K does not really qualify as a marathon but it was promoted as such so I’m just following their lead. Plus it sounds cool to say ” Yeah, I ran a marathon this weekend.”

Because it is summer in Manila and HOT, I had to wake up at 3:45am so I could meet my work colleagues (It was a office bonding event and many of the staff participated) for the beginning of the race which started at 5:30am.  The sun was not even foolish enough to be awake when I got up. I’m pretty sure it was a little sad that day. Part of it’s PURPOSE in life is to wake me up with it’s happy sunshiney goodness. It didn’t get that opportunity Sunday. No one was more sad about that then me.

Lining up to start the race

Look at this crowd! We were definitely not alone.

Filipinos love for their skin to be light so there were many people walking around offering sun block to the runners. Interestingly enough, no one offered it to this white girl. I burn, people! But I figured, it’s 3K…how burnt could I really get; so I let them pass.

The race started with an enthusiastic guy (of course he is, he doesn’t have to run) counting down from ten and then yelling “Go!” Enthusiastically, we cheered and started to run.

About 3 steps.

It’s called traffic, people traffic. So we were forced to just kind of run in place. It felt wrong to just stand there and not do SOMETHING.

It wasn’t long before the way was cleared and we were off.

Let me interject by saying–I am out of shape! I really mean that. I don’t remember the last time I went running. Or did any serious exercise. It’s not that I dislike working out…I just hate to run. So you may be wondering why I was in a marathon. Don’t ask me to explain how my strange mind works. I’m more of a martial arts, kickboxing, tae bo, dance, kind of exerciser.

Still, I am quite stubborn and competitive so I was determined to run as far as I could without stopping. That equaled about 1.5K…about a mile. That may seem weak to you. Please, I encourage you to read my disclaimer above. If you’re too lazy to scroll up or just have really bad memory (might want to get that checked out), I’ll tell you again….I am out of shape.

The last half I alternated between running and walking. I hilariously tried to sprint there at the end. Unfortunately, I seriously misjudged the remaining distance. I didn’t make it at a full sprint. In fact, panting, I had to walk a bit. I’d be embarrassed about that if not for the fact that…

I AM OUT OF SHAPE!

But I did push myself. I will not share my time, it is not important. The important thing is that a big guy who has at least 100 pounds on me sprinted past me at the very end. No wait, that is not the important thing. The important thing is that I finished. And got free stuff!

The run was sponsored by Neutrogena and they had the best gift bags put together. We got a tank top and tshirt proclaiming we Chased the Sun (the slogan for the race). I also loved how the shirt lists 3k, 5k, 10k, and 15k. No one has to know I ran the shortest one. Muahahaha. Our bag included lots of goodies as well. They even had booths set up with lots of free stuff. We couldn’t resist jumping on the trampoline and posing for a free pic.

Carefree spokeswomen

I was proud of all of our staff for coming out and running.

And I was really glad I didn’t try for the 5k. But there is always next year…

Life is not a fairytale. Though it is filled with things that make your heart feel overwhelmed by the goodness and joy in it, we are only able to see how good life is because it is contrasted with the bad. No one can honestly say, “Oh I love it when Satan is attacking my life and everything seems to happen at once!” Those times are not fun, but they are necessary! For one thing, they make the good times a little bit sweeter. There is also this:

We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.

Romans 5:3-5

I don’t know about you, but when I come out the other side from those trials of life, I feel stronger. I feel more loved and protected by God. I find a new hope in his promises. I can feel him more closely and an intense appreciation for his faithfulness wells up in me.

This past week a few of those trials crept up on me and their remnants continue to surround me. Still, God never left me.  I was hurting. doubting. deflated. But I turned around there was God. I cried and he comforted me. I failed and he forgave me. I needed encouragement and he gave it. I still need those things, but there is a new joy in me. That even though some of those trials continue to stick around like those nasty cockroaches in my apt, I know who also is sticking around. My FATHER.

And last night as I thought through these things and started reading a psalm, the first verse jumped off the page at me. It was a reminder of how to live and then transformed into a truth that my heart could rejoice in.

Psalm 108:1

My heart is confident in you, O God;no wonder I can sing your praises with all my heart!

What a mighty God we serve! Praise Him today.